How do I make my husband get me gifts? Like bday presents...?

He remembers my bdays but a nice pat on the back is all I get. I always make his day super special w/ gifts and romance but no matter how many hints I send him (love flowers, romantic dinner, not expensive stuff) he believes that gifts are a waste of money. He says his money is my money and just go buy something if I wanted .. but that is not what I want. I wish my husband would give me a surprise "anything" just once a year. Forget Christmas, Valentines, he just believes in NO celebration. (I am so complete opposite). It is so unromantic, so frustrating in those special days.

How do I make my husband get me gifts? Like bday presents...?
You can't really make him buy you gifts, instead, you have to talk to him and let him know that every now and then, you would enjoy the element of surprise in your relationship. If he thinks it's a waste of money, there are other ways to surprise you. My husband and I do believe that Valentine's day, etc are all wasteful holidays that stores promote in order to make more money. If he wants it to be meaningful, he can do something as simple as cooking a nice meal for you or cleaning up the house. When I come home from work and I see that my fiance has gone through great lengths and effort to cook me supper, it makes my day.





If he still doesn't clue in, you really have to spell it out for him. Men don't get it, they are clueless when it comes to these things.
Reply:give and you should receive
Reply:I guilted mine into straightening up his act... I spent sooo many years without ever getting anything recognized...so one year, I think it was Mothers Day and it came and again it was nothing to him...I mean, I'd only given him 4 kids no big deal right? So, my oldest had made soemthing at school for me and when I opened it, it reminded me how unappreciated I was by my hub and I spent the whole day crying over it....everytime he asked what was wrong I told him over and over that i was obviously wasting my time as I was totally unappreciated..and unloved. Whe3n he argued he did love me, I kept telling him ACTIONS SPEAK LOUDER THAN WORDS BUDDY! Then I turned and made his Fathers Day awesome.....and then my kids on Fathers Day said to him..How come you don't do this for Mommy on Mothers Day? I think thats what finally got him..... Now I get gifts for everything..
Reply:It's one thing to be "unromantic" - but he sounds completely and utterly selfish to boot. Marriage isn't all about how *you* feel, it's a lot about how your partner feels. I don't know how to "make" him do something he sees no value in doing - and I'm not talking about the "gifts" per say, but about making his partener happy. I suppose, one practical solution would be to do something special on these days *together* - like, plan a small get-away together, go to a nice dinner together, buy something that both of you have been wanting to buy, together. I'm afraid, tho, that he will never get it, you'll always have to be the insigator.





Then again, if this is his only fault, you're not doing so bad!
Reply:You cannot make him do anything. You should have recognized this about him when you were dating. Accept him for who is is. Pray that he will become more considerate to your needs. and take the money he offered and treat yourself to a relaxing day at the spa. or whatever is comfortable for you.
Reply:Mr. Chivalry says, "If a man can't do the same for you, then he doesn't deserve it. Wait, I shouldn't say that. I'd say, slow down on getting him so much, but continue to be the bigger person. Ultimately he SHOULD see how special he is to you, and if he can't or doesn't, then use the money you spend on him, to treat yourself. He'll realize what he's missing."
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Reply:Just go buy what you want and give him the receipt if you have separate bank account. If you share accounts then that's easier just buy what you want and tell him thanks. You don't need to make a big deal out of it. Plus you know most men suck at picking good gift. I have to bring a catalog home and make the pages or print off items I would like and leave them on his desk. But still I get either the wrong color or the wrong size. So I just do it my self and give him the receipt for reimbursement.
Reply:Stop buying him gifts. That should send him the message. You can't make him buy gifts for you. What would be the fun in getting something you had to force him to buy?
Reply:Stop!!! Don't get him anything, and stop celebrating his days!!!


I bet he will miss it.