Friday, November 13, 2009

What to do about a family member who never buys gifts or invites you over?

I have an Aunt who never has bought a gift for anyone in my family. My Mom treats her to dinner, cooks for her, etc.. not once has she come over with flowers or anything as a way to say thanks.. My Mom invites her over , cooks for her, spends over $100... Also we have treated her out to dinner...


She is a wealthy woman btw..


One time she invited us to her house, there was no food in her fridge or house and she said that she usually goes to her friends house to eat, we would up treating her at her own house..


Well I had a talk with my Mom and said how this all sickens me,, we havent invited her over anymore and shes not talking to us anymore...





I dont understand why she treats us like this?

What to do about a family member who never buys gifts or invites you over?
You cant do anything about it.


You may talk to your Aunt and tell her you would like to spend more time with her. Or are you wanting her to buy you things? I am a bit confused with you there.
Reply:you will have these kin folks, friends whatever, doing this throughout your life. either get use to it or do like me when you are old enough and stop visiting them. i don't have time for selfish people.
Reply:Family can be pretty jacked up sometimes (or in your case all the time), but we put up with the behavior, because we love them. As much as we may dislike a family member their still is that familial bond.


I'm not saying that you shouldn't be mad or sickened, but maybe it's time to tell her what's up. She is family right? Talk it out with her. Family interventions can be the way.
Reply:be civil to her, but don't trust her for anything. this is a good example to show that blood isn't thicker than water.
Reply:Do you wonder how she stays wealthy? Heh. In my experience, when a family member acts like that I just leave them be. Dont confront her,if you see her dont be nasty, just leave her alone. Eventually you will hear from her, or you wont, but I dont think it would be a very big loss, if shes just a mooch. Let her come to you to talk about it. Good luck!
Reply:She is not directing any anger toward you. She doesn't THINK of you. She is egocentric ( a taker). Simply ask yourself, " Do I want a relationship with her under these conditions?" If it continues to gall you, then you could always pop in for visits other than dinner time. And not include her during festive occasions.


My Mom was similar. It was a 8:1 ratio with dinners. We just had a quiet disrespect for her.
Reply:no,dont do that..if you give something or help someone dont expect in return,just help them with all your heart..its better to give than to recieve..if ever your family had a problem you can ask him to help but if she refuse,dont tell them all of your good deeds to him but instead of not mind him.God is wathcing those good people,maybe the good karma is not over yet just wait it patiently.
Reply:I say you put a flaming bag of dog poo on her porch. That'll teach her.

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