Loss of loved ones?? Sympathy gifts, flowers, care packages...?

My son's great-grandfather (his daddy's grandpa) just passed away. My son's dad and I get along wonderfully, and we love each other. He was extremely close to his grandfather (he was raised by his grandparents), and my son had been around him a little. The issue I'm having is that I live in the South and he (son's dad) and his family live up North(and most of the family, namely his sister, can't stand me). I don't know what's appropriate to send. I really don't want to offend anyone or make things worse, when things are already not going well. Should I (and my family) send flowers, a care package (food, gift certificates, plates, utensils...), sympathy gift...??????? Does anyone have any ideas or help here?????? It would be greatly appreciated!

Loss of loved ones?? Sympathy gifts, flowers, care packages...?
When my grandfather died, the thing that I really wanted was not so much a gift, but more of a sentimental heartfelt token of sympathy. Flowers are nice, but they too die. My best friend sent me a letter that she had written in by hand. For me this showed that she loved me enough to take time her busy schedule and tell me that she was there for me.


I think that a letter or card, if worded right is enough. You don't need anything else.


My condolences for your families loss.
Reply:I think just a sympathy card would be fine.
Reply:Send a live sympathy plant to the funeral home. Sign it from you and your son, to your sons father and his family. It is something that your sons father can take home with him after. Peace Lilly's are always nice. If the funeral has already happened, then a fruit basket with a card.
Reply:Flowers would be nice, or a card. With family gathering around food is a big help. One of their local supermarkets probably has a delivery service for sandwich trays, veggie trays, etc. You still care about your son's dad and it is his loss, so do send something. Even if they don't really like you, it is the right thing to do. Could give them a better opinion of you, but mostly it is the right thing to do.